Neon Lights

At night when the city lights up, the visual artistry can be incredible!  The colors are vivid and brilliant. Neon lights direct city dwellers to their destination or drawing newcomers near pointing out what they hope you will see.  However, there are times when you just don’t want to see things.  When you would rather see a shadow than a bright glowing reminder of what might be.

I know I am moving and I am very aware of the transition issues, as I’m learning to take my own advice.  But I wonder, how do you handle it when the week highlights weaknesses and failures?  I guess everyone who moves must let go at some point.  Let go of the hopes and wishes you might have for where you’re at.  For example, the dream of counseling handbooks, ambassador social networks, team unity, having a team, or the realization that lessons taught while there will no longer be taught.  It’s tough to say goodbye and trust that those to follow will carry the torch.

So the advice I’m giving myself?   Celebrate the wins, acknowledge what has been accomplished and choose to believe that those to follow WILL do it better.

A quick visit

April came and left in a blink of an eye!  First trip was to Japan, second trip was to WA, USA, all while I was sorting out my shipment to move home.  Was it a good trip?  Do I have a job?   Friends and family are so caring, but I wonder, “How many times can I answer this question?”  The answers…Yes, it was a great trip, and NO, I don’t have a job for next year.  Anyone have a middle school or high school counseling job for me?

Randomness of a move

I have moved many, many, many…many time in my life.  Here’s how it went.  Decision to move, pack my room, load up the car (or parents loading up the truck), drive to the new house, unpack and head off to school.  We always had a destination, we were the movers and it was a linear process.  Moving home to the US is NOT a linear process!!!
Decide this is the last year in china, still work an entire contract year after notice is given, wait, wait, wait, wait, sort items in apartment, take pictures of everything, determine what will be shipped, sold, or given away, create spread sheet of items.  Call moving companies to schedule surveys (they will pack and ship for me) choose date to ship items, make decision if shipment will be sent door to door, or to the port of Seattle (money talks) send shipment LONG before I ever move.  Again…wait wait wait.  YOu get the idea.  No current identified destination, no job, no truck to load up when I’m ready.  This is a whole new world.

It’s all a question

Moving can be one of the most stressful events in a person’s life.  When you move to a new country, you expect things to be different and therefore difficult.  However, it is often forgotten that moving “home” can be just as different and difficult.   To add to what I know as a counselor, I have NO IDEA where I will be living or working, if I will live near friends or family, or if after four years of not driving I will be able to follow the rules of the road.  (Shanghai traffic is its own anomaly)
So where am I at in this process?  I am smack in the middle of my last semester at work.  Preparing a job for someone to take over is a massive task.  I think I will leave this until May. (Don’t tell my boss I like to procrastinate)

It’s real

Yesterday marked my 100 days remaining in China.  It was four years ago that I arrived in Shanghai with much excitement and anxiety as I was about to embark on a new adventure.  I had no idea at that time what impact this move would have on my life.  I have learned so much about China, Shanghai, adapting to other cultures and most importantly, I have learned a great deal about myself.

This move is becoming real.